Thursday, 25 March 2010

easily amused

now this may get a little frightening so don't be afraid to run away.

Today I have been thinking about lap dancing (which means this blog will get more hits than usual)

Now I'm aware, without being vain, that I'm a bit of a sex god but on this occasion I wasn't thinking about performing a lap dance although that isn't a definite no because I do need money and\or appreciation constantly. Oh no, today i was thinking about receiving a lap dance, which I haven't (who has money to spare for these basic needs these days). In actual fact I've only ever been in a lap dance club once. And it was closed. And I was only there to service the sanitary bins. I digress, which may be the safer course, so, i was saying, I was thinking about being the recipient of a lap dance, wondering, I suppose, what it feels like etc etc.
I think I would feel rather uncomfortable, I'm ok with nudity, I've done it, and I'm ok with dancing, I've tried to do it but the whole 'you will perform for me' thing is contrary to my nature and I'm sure I'd be saying 'have a sit down, love, let me do a bit for you.
I mean, you chose a woman who conforms to your idea of beauty\sexiness whatever and then she effectively does the old mating dance right in front of you and gets her kit off AND YOU CAN'T TOUCH! that's not natural (I'm not saying a man has the right to take what he wants from a woman so don't start preaching feminist stuff at me). What I'm saying is that if i (assuming I feel free to seek a partner) see a woman who I think is wonderful and sexy and lovely blah, blah and she likes to discuss poetry and literature and doesn't take life too seriously etc what should i do, should I offer her some money so that she can get me rather uncomfortably turned on then dash off to the toilets to give myself a consolation prize or should I engage her in conversation, dazzle her with my wit, charm her with my gentlemanly manners and then invite her back for coffee and confess that I do have this fantasy as I slip on some sexy music..........

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