Tuesday, 31 July 2007

I must surely be the most boring blogger alive

got called this morning to go into work, it was multi-drop delivery which is hard work.

As I drove the streets of the area I felt strangely content, I like doing different stuff each day and a job is a job I just do my best and smile at everyone

hey Morgetron, here's your answers

1) For this question, even if you don't believe in reincarnation -- pretend you do -- and if you do believe ... well yay! Who do you believe you were in a past life? (It doesn't have to be a famous historical figure ... You might just give a description of the type of person you may have been.)
I think I was a troubadour in the court of a minor king. Charming his family and making his small victories into epics.
2) Have you ever met any "famous" people? If so, who? If not, who's on your top five list of people you'd like to meet (not necessarily famous)?
I haven't met anyone really famous. The people I most want to meet are 'real' people. I am not going to list names because that would be (a) embarrassing and (b) dangerous but they are all people I've met on the internet.
3) What are three things you feel you must do before your die?
(1) see 2 above (2) visit several other countries, ideally touch ever continent. (3) Live
4) In your opinion, what constitutes "cheating" in a relationship?
Not being honest about your feelings
5) Of the fictional characters (in TV, books, movies, plays, etc.) you've encountered, who would make the best LOVER AND why?
Ayla from the Earth's Children series because she is so in touch with nature and her senses and she is without deceit

Interview rules: Leave me a comment saying “Interview me next" or "Hit me with your best shot" or something along those lines letting me know you're down to be questioned. :D
I’ll respond by commenting back on your blog with your five questions. I get to pick the questions.You will then update your blog with a post containing your the answers to the questions.You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
So, who wants to give it a go? Leave a comment and let me know if you're down to let me do you next. At least one of you has to let me do an interview with ya. It'll be easy, fun, virtually painless and you'll enjoy it. :D
Anyone else up for an interview? See my blog and leave a comment!

Monday, 30 July 2007

it's not easy!

I realised on Friday that a writing competition which i intended entering had a closing date of 31st July. I decided that i could still get an entry in but I hadn't bargained for my usual weekend. It is very difficult to get time for my self on a weekend and by the time I do it's usually so late that I can barely type let alone put together a piece that has any chance of winning.
In the end I have used a short story I have already written, not my best work but at least I entered.

Sunday, 29 July 2007

on being interviewed

I have told two people that they may interview me and that is quite enough for now hehe

I just know that you are all desperate to ask me questions so I have decided that, apart from the two i have already said can interview me, anyone can ask me ONE question (and I might even a. reply, b. be honest, c. still talk to them)

Friday, 27 July 2007

an abandoned toad

arggggggg! in the last two days my daughter Sophie has gone away on a school trip to SE France and best pal has gone on holiday.

Poor toad sits here feeling sorry for himself and trying to get lots of work to pay of debts but mainly to fill time.

Thursday, 26 July 2007

ok, I'll do it for you Missy and Jo

1. What is your middle name: Paul
2. Color pants are you wearing? Black
3. What are you listening to now? Silence
4. What was the last thing you had to drink? Tea
5. Do you wish on stars? Oh yes!!!!!
6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Purple
7. How is the weather right now? Hot and close
8. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My sister
9. Do you like the person who sent this to you? They both seem good to me lol
10. Favorite drink? Sicilean red wine
11. Favorite sport? running
12. Hair color? Brown
13. Siblings? 1 sister, 2 brothers
14. Favorite month: October
15. Favorite food? Pate (if I have to choose)
16. What was the last movie you saw? The Sweetest Thing
17. Favorite day of the year: 31st October
18. What do you do to vent anger? run
19. What was your favorite toy as a child? toy train
20. Summer or winter? summer
21. Hugs or kisses? mainly hugs but kisses when it counts
22.Car or motorcycle? car
23. Chocolate or vanilla? chocolate
24. Do you want your friends to do this? friends? what friends?
25. Who is most likely to do this self-survey? bit late to ask that lol
26. Who is least likely to respond? anyone who hasn't by now!
27. When was the last time you cried? yesterday
28. What is under your bed? sun lounger
29. Who is the friend you have had the longest? this is so sad (Karen, about 3 years)
30. What did you do last night? celebrated my daughter's birthday and fell asleep on my chair
31. What are you afraid of? being alone
32. Plain or buttered or salted popcorn? Butter
33. Favorite car? vauxhall cavalier
34. Favorite flower? roses
35. How many keys on your key ring? 5
36. How many years at your current job? 7 weeks
37. What did you do on your last birthday? spent the best bit on line with friends then did some trick or treating
38. How many states have you lived in?1
39.did you have fun with this? yep
40. Who are you going to send this to? no-one lol

I am behind

I seem to be posting a day behind at the moment, I'm just so slow.

Yesterday was my daughter's birthday and as always the sun shone for her so it was swimsuits in the garden, wine and beer.

I was completely exhausted and woke up in my chair at 3am which is why I wasn't on line for long.

Tuesday, 24 July 2007

I have journeyed far

completed my trip down south. I was delivering a van load of LaSenza Knickers to their warehouse near Heathrow. A quiet, uneventful journey which i found quite relaxing although I did have a row with the Sat nav!

Monday, 23 July 2007

Blooming weekends!

I have had a rather traumatic weekend.

Marital relations are not good and much of the weekend has been a case of me not being talked to. There was a time when I relished this silence but I do need some human interaction and I felt quite lonely. Last night my eldest daughter broke up with her b\f because he found out that she had kissed someone. She was drunk and the lad 'persuaded' her to go off with him. This is very scary and she has been told in no uncertain terms that she does not drink outside the home and at home only with expressed permission.

Today has been a day of tears and my only respite was a couple of minutes on line when I touched base with my best friend, I was amazed that so brief a contact could restore me so much.

Friday, 20 July 2007

a travelling toad

I've always wanted to travel and finally my prayers have been answered. The agency want me to drive a delivery down to Middlesex on Monday hehe

It will be a pleasant change and a chance to release some bookcrossing books

My 'church'

I think my 'church' must be the quietest place on the planet lol

Writing Group

Had a great time at the writing group although there was much sadness at the thought of not meeting until September. The people there tonight were just what I needed to lift my spirits as I'd felt myself descending into a pit of despair all day and nearly didn't do.

Thursday, 19 July 2007


I've got the day off! and now I'm bored and restless. There's no -one to play with or chat to and I just can't settle blah!

At least this evening I'm going out for a meal with the writing group which will be nice although the down side is that it marks the end of the term and there will be no writing group until September.

Wednesday, 18 July 2007

The Library job

It was pre blog when i applied for the full time job on the mobile library, I really thought I'd got it but instead i got the standard letter........'you interviewed well........ strong candidates.......very close etc etc'

Today, while i was at work doing the job I didn't get, I found out just how Strong the candidates who beat me were.

#1. she had the driving assessment last week and can't drive the bigger vehicles.

#2. they are having to make further enquiries as his police check threw up some worrying information.

ok so in a way it feels good that the library service are suffering for not picking me but then i get to thinking, these people beat me to the job lol so where does that leave me?

tagged on all sides

1. I have to post these rules before I give you the facts.
2. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
3. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
4. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
5. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

So then 8 things about toadee

1. Toadee isn't my real name (honest), it actually comes from an insult at primary school
2. I lived in a monestary for several years
3. I am a serial tea drinker when at home but always drink coffee when out.
4. I am a qualified psychiatric nurse
5. I am a hobbit
6. I have never asked a woman(or girl) out
7. I am very good at coming second
8. I love not often, but well

I am tagging

Jadey, Jo, Karen, Keith, Morgetron, renee, Missy, CD

I know most have been tagged already but I only have so many friends lol

Tuesday, 17 July 2007

back on the buses!

back on the library bus today. was like I'd never been away lol.

looking at the rota for next week I see that the big boss is spending a day with me next week, hmmmmmm, wonder what that's about.

Monday, 16 July 2007

culture (in Yorkshire?)

yesterday evening the entire family joined thousands of people in the grounds of a local stately home for the annual Opera in the park concert. It was a lovely evening and the weather and music were excellent. it is something of a tradition that people bring the trappings of fine living so there are lots of groups sat around tables in evening dress dining on exquisite foods and sipping the finest champagne, as the sun goes down thousands of lamps and candelabrum twinkle and thousands of voices join with the better know pieces. Unfortunately, my family do not enjoy the sense of occasion so we ate crisps and drank wine and beer on a rug in our jeans.

Today we should have been back there for the Party in the Park concert which features music of a more modern style, the rain was coming down in buckets so we didn't bother.

These events are one of the better things about Leeds as both events are free.

Saturday, 14 July 2007

I'm a bit wobbly

mood wise that is.
I'm very up and down but I am keeping busy. I know when i get like this I'm hyper sensitive so i tend to be quiet and to avoid people so that i don't either annoy them or get annoyed.

I am going through a spell of not believing I can write anything worth while and of course the harder I try the less the ideas flow. O think it is best if I stop trying and do something which encourages me to think and strangely enough the thing that really gets my juices flowing is housework so if I can do a bit of frantic polishing or get my hands wet doing a load of delicates then I will be more my self.

Thursday, 12 July 2007

writing group

there are such talented people in my writing group, sometimes i just want to sit and listen. Tonight a couple of people had written beautiful pieces where i had written shallow drivel which i was ashamed to read. I love writing and sometimes I write things I'm proud of but mostly I write to relax and as therapy, I know I'll never be truly talented and that's ok.

More work I'm afraid

no word from the agency so it's looking like I can't have any of the library work, the other agency rang me about the mileage claims and then asked me if i could do some work for them this weekend but i can't.

I decided that work is important but I have to strike a balance and I need time with my children.

Work again!

as I near the end of my two weeks on the school book collection job I fondly rub my aching wrists (there is a lot of lifting and carrying) and ponder the future. The agency rang to see if i could do a couple more weeks on the mobile library but I'm not sure if you, my reader(s?) can stand any more inane rambling.
If I take on this contract I will be working on Sophie's birthday, miss my last writing group before the summer holiday and miss seeing Sophie off on her trip to France with school.

I am giving this much thought but may try for sharing the contract with another driver.

Wednesday, 11 July 2007

stepping back into the past

For the first time in about 18 months I decided to go to my local bookcrossing meet up (if you want to know more about bookcrossing there is a link over there ------------>

I got there really late because my wife had other plans (which didn't put me in the best of moods) so I only had about 30 minutes there. It was lovely to see a few of the old faces and a couple of new ones but i didn't get much chance to talk to people.

As an aside, when I picked out some books to take I went to my 'read it now get rid of it' box. This box contained books that I haven't looked at for a good while and I rarely remember the provenance of a particular book unless it holds special significance. One of the books I took turned out to have come from a person who I want very much to keep well in the past, it was a bit creepy seeing the name come up but in a way I felt good that I was 'discarding' a remaining part of that person.

Monday, 9 July 2007

I don't understand

I was just watching a tv programme about hypnotherapy.
It featured a couple who had quite significant relationship and personality differences and the hypnotherapist was going to do a series of sessions to help them resolve their differences.

I can't see how this can work, sure, you can bring someone to change values and beliefs or encourage them to 'not see' the undesirable aspects of their partner but then it's no longer the same people. I have always believed in the idea of accepting someone and knowing when you meet the right person because it feels right and there are no major 'issues'

Secondly, this couple aren't even married, shouldn't they cut their losses rather than invest in a relationship which is doomed before they even make it official.

A meeting of minds

I have decided that blogger will be the new home for an old project of mine, the Church of the terminally bemused. Let's see how it goes lol

Sunday, 8 July 2007

A new direction for my daughter

this morning my younger daughter, Sophie played in her first ever hockey match. Those who have born my rantings in other places will recall that Sophie is a keen football player so hockey is something different.
I was so proud of her, the ream lost but it was their first ever match so it wasn't a big surprise. I talked to the coach and commented that I thought Sophie's ball control was good. He said that this had been noted and that he very much wanted her to join his club as he feels she has a natural talent and could well be county or even national material, all this from one match hehe.

Sophie and I have discussed her sporting commitments and she can manage football and hockey.

a lesson: just go for it!!

A toad alone

today we were invited to sister in law's partner's house for a bbq. I had planned to spend the day doing jobs around the house but wife had accepted on behalf of us all even though none of us really wanted to go.
I have felt very anti-social today and the last thing I wanted was to be in company because then I appear rude when really I'm just feeling that I want to feel safe.
Anyway we went and I said enough to be polite although inside I was feeling very uneasy. I know that my mood is getting a bit shaky but I'll cope with that.

Talking of appearing rude. A salesman came to the door today, wanted to save me a fortune on the price of my household fuel. I told him not to waste his time as I wasn't interested, he carried on talking, I told him that I really wasn't interested, he carried on. Finally I said that I had told him twice that I wasn't interested but he seemed to be having difficulty understanding what i meant by that and that to make it clearer I was actually indicating that our conversation was over and invited him to depart my property politely.
My wife then appeared from behind the door and told me off for being rude but i thought I was being assertive. I guess I'll get it right one day lol

Saturday, 7 July 2007

wanderings and small victories

Finished work early today so I indulged my self. I went into town and just chilled. I also bought a small wedding gift for a good friend i met on line.

while I was in town my wife rang to say that I had been underpaid for my work last weekend so i called into the agency. Yep they had had problems because the work I'm doing doesn't fit into any of their pre-defined categories, they have sorted it out and I will get paid BUT she then told me that they had reduced the payment per mile for my driving on the advice of a colleague at another office. I told them that they were already getting a very good deal from me and that their colleague was taking the p*ss. I said that i wasn't prepared to work for such a low amount.

Hehe, they increased the payment!

Thursday, 5 July 2007

Writing Group

I actually managed to get to my writing group this evening. It's been a few weeks due to my work and I'm glad to say they missed me. I hadn't prepared any writing so I did a quick piece while I was waiting for the group to start.

We only have two more meetings before the summer break and I am already feeling sad about that, the people in the group are very diverse but they are all lovely people and they have played a part in keeping me human through the hard times.

They have often commented that my writing is intensely personal and that it is a window to my soul and I think, sometimes, this has been true. The longer serving members of my writing group know me better than anyone in the world barring one person and that is indeed a tribute to their care and understanding.

Wednesday, 4 July 2007

Silly me!

While I was doing the rounds of the schools today I became deeply enamoured of the smells emanating from the school kitchens. How strange I thought, school dinners never used to have me drooling like pavlov's pet pooch. As I trundled along wending my weary way I pondered the reason for my sudden collapse of culinary standards. Finally it hit me, I wasn't loosing my taste for the finer things, I was hungry! Silly, silly Toadee Tim, I had a lovely roast chicken dinner on Monday evening but I had clean forgotten to eat since.

lesson: don't just wake up and smell the coffee, smell the whole meal (oh, and then eat it)

Monday, 2 July 2007

Prepare to be very interested

This week I am collecting books from primary schools for the library service which means spending the day chugging around in a white van. Do you have 'white van men' in other countries, here in the UK they are a breed apart. White van men are renown for their bad and inconsiderate driving and their strong opinions - I am training hard to be worthy of the title and today I tried to pluck up courage to perfect the WVM leer which is directed at female motorists and pedestrians whenever there is an opportunity.

Ever the weekend I did several pick up jobs for my other agency, I ws out at Fountains Abbey again and I remembered to take my camera. Unfortunately I forgot that I had it with me lol. Perhaps next time.

lesson for today: I will never be King Leer