Thursday, 16 August 2007

The Nekkid Toadee

if you read the previous posting (I won't blame you if you skipped it lol) then you will have noticed Driving and Hygiene Toadee the first in a new line to challenge that bimbo Barbie.

Of course there is a desperate need for more specialized Toadee dolls and in the spirit of the moment I approached a major manufacturer to suggest a nekkid Toadee doll.

Here is a short except from the discussion which may help you to understand why the nekkid Toadee isn't going into production just yet.

T = Toadee
CE = Chief executive

T: I really think this could work, Ken made it big, why not Toadee?

CE: I have to say we have looked very carefully at your proposal and there are some issues.

T: Issues? ok, lets get them on the table

CE: ah, well I'm not sure we should be putting these issues on the table

T: sorry you've lost me

CE :(sotto voce) I wish

CE: well the thing is, ken was, well, lacking in certain areas

T: ?

CE: he was well, not all Barbie might have hoped for, a disappointment, not all there, less than a whole man.

T: ah, got ya, but that needn't be a problem here, The toadee doll must be 100% realistic.

CE: that IS the problem

T: no, don't tell me, if you were to add the bits Ken don't have AND be realistic the cost of the extra plastic would be too high. Am I right or am I right?

CE: can I be blunt? thank you. The thing is we have spent a lot of money making scale models and market testing. The model we used was 100% accurate everything was in the proportions found on a real toadee.

T: woohoo, world plastic shortage? fainting ladies? massive fan club?

CE: actually none of the above

T: so what's the problem?

CE: we showed the Nekkid Toadee doll to 100 people

10% laughed
10% Cried
50% said that we should add something down below
20% couldn't see any difference between the Nekkid Toadee and a naked Ken
and 10% offered money for the specialist surgery for whoever the doll was based on.

so that's why you won't be getting a nekkid toadee doll in your stocking next Christmas.

Of course this is all a work of fiction (or is it?)


Rebicmel said...

roflmao Toadee this is priceless

Toadee said...

the blog may be priceless but the doll will cost a fortune (when I persuade them to add more plastic)